Obsessing

I am a fairly private person. The irony of being private and a blogger is not lost on me, but I feel like I can control it. I chose what I tell my blog and twitter and who I tell about it. I have a delightful core cadre of readers who I adore and are almost entirely online friends. I have told exactly 5 people I know “in real life” about this blog.

It is my dirty little secret.

I’m not sure why. I think I feel like people would laugh at the lovely little world I have built. I’m quite proud, but I feel like people wouldn’t understand. And it is hard to explain to people (like my in-laws) who don’t really even know that blogs exits. I finally told a friend who is also a blogger. He seemed annoyed to say the least that in nearly 2 years of having this blog, I never told him. The other people who know are 1 friend, my sister, one of my sister-in-laws and my husband. I could come out of the closet I suppose. Just think of the 10 more page views! That’s like a whole nickel in ad revenue,

I don’t really care.

I don’t write for my relatives or for my son. I write for me. It has it advantages. I don’t need to feel obligated to keep an online baby book, or fulfill the needs of photo hungry relatives. I can bounce from idea to project to prompt and do what I please. It’s very freeing. I love it. But, why don’t I have the confidence to share it?

I guess I do care.

Also? I like cute pictures.

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3 Responses to “Obsessing”

  1. Suzanne says:

    I NEVER intended for my blog to be found by real-life friends and family. Some of the stuff I posted back in the early days is much much too personal for my mother or mother-in-law to read. But somehow my sister-in-law found it and made it her mission to share it with EVERYONE in the family. Nice. I’m still really pissed at her – especially after she went to great lengths to make her OWN blog anonymous.

    But I got over it. If they want to read, that’s fine, but they aren’t allowed to be mad about anything I write.

    Now the weirdest part is that I know all my friends follow me, so when I try to talk to them about our trip to Ohio or Evan’s speech therapy appointment they say “Oh, I know, I read it on your blog.”

    [Reply]

    TMae Reply:

    I’m still kind of amazed that your sister-in-law found you and outed you. NOT NICE.

    [Reply]

  2. TMae says:

    I had originally intended to be 100% anonymous. I wasn’t going to tell ANYONE about it. I thought it would free me to write stuff that I wouldn’t write if I were open about it. But you know what? I haven’t written anything I wouldn’t talk about. I haven’t written anything about my family, I haven’t touched on anything political that I’m not already vocal about, I haven’t posted one single thing that I wouldn’t sit down with anyone and have a conversation about face-to-face. So, 3 or 4 of my meat (an internet friend of mine calls her face-to-face friends her “meat” friends, and I kind of love that) friends know about the blog, and I’m considering putting it on my Facebook page so anyone I know who is so inclined to read it can. I’m not sure what I’m hiding it for anymore…

    Please note, I lied to someone a few months ago about whether or not I had a blog. So there’s that.

    [Reply]

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