Posts Tagged ‘parenting’

Flying Solo

Friday, October 22nd, 2010

Hubs got back tonight from 5 days/4 nights out of town. He left for a mandatory work thing, so I shouldn’t complain. He works hard and as a result I can stay home with Spencer. Plus he was in Temecula, so its not like he was somewhere super awesome. The last time he was gone was for 3 weeks in April and Spencer was much more aware of his absence. He would run to our bed every morning and yell Da! And then his face would crumple. Spencer is used to hubs being gone before he gets up, but for some reason this was especially sad this week.

He had a good time in mama's boots.

I don’t know how single parents do it. I skipped baths, lazed out on breakfast and barely even left the house. In my defense, it was rainy and in Southern California, that means the world is coming to an end. And no one can drive, so it is super dangerous to even leave the house. That and I am lazy and was in a funk most of the days. By the end of day 5, I was trying to have a rational conversation with a toddler. It did not go well and Spencer threw plastic cars at my head while I ignored him and played Angry Birds on my phone. Not my finest moment as a mother.

Saying No

Monday, August 30th, 2010

I was not prepared for the relentless need to say no. No Spencer, don’t fling yourself off the couch. No Spencer, don’t throw my phone. No Spencer, it is not nice to gouge out my eye. No biting. No climbing. No pinching. No throwing food. No spitting food. No. No. No.

It is sucking out my soul. I ended up curled up in a ball on the floor, near tears, because I couldn’t take saying it anymore. With him smacking me in the face of course. Up until now, I felt like I was taking to this whole parenting thing pretty well, but now I am at an utter loss. I’ve tried distraction. I’ve tried redirection. I’ve tried trading the off-limits item for a toy. There is about a 50% success rate with the other half of the time resulting in screaming and crying.

I think it is book time. I’m looking at No-Cry Discipline Solution and Happiest Toddler on the Block. I also think I need some more local friends. Or maybe I just need to make more of an effort with the few that I do have. I’m feeling frustrated and trapped in the house, but at the same time feeling too lazy to go anywhere. Maybe Spencer is acting out because he is bored. He didn’t act like this in San Francisco. One thing is clear, some things have to change or I am going to go insane.

My baby is trying to kill me

Sunday, August 29th, 2010

I feel like Lois from Family Guy. So far this morning, Spencer has kicked me in the eye, bit me on the arm hard enough to bruise, head-butted me in the throat hard enough to knock the wind out of me, pulled out my hair, scratched my face and bit me while nursing hard enough to draw blood. It is only noon and I am sure I missed something.

Baby Tricks

Tuesday, August 17th, 2010

Spencer has a few tricks up his sleeve. He can peek-a-boo; he can throw a napkin on his head and pulls it down and giggles after you ask “Where’s Spencer?”; he can clap and sometimes high-five; and if you ask “what’s a monkey say?” he’ll answer oo-oooo. It’s not like I make him put on a show, but he does love attention and likes to perform.

At brunch a little while ago, the meal was winding down, but people were lingering over their food, which is always tricky when you have a baby at the table. Spencer was finished eating and getting figity, so the easiest thing to do was bust out a napkin and play a few rounds of Where’s Spencer? to amuse the out of town relatives. And then, someone at the table stated, “Isn’t it interesting how we expect young children to perform like pets.” What. The. Hell?

First of all, thanks a ton for debasing my parenting. Would you rather here my baby cry, have him try and throw himself out of the chair or start yanking the tablecloth out from everyone’s hot coffee? Yep, that would be awesome. She was already appalled that I let him have a bite of a chocolate croissant. Oh no! The bite will kill him. So I wasn’t in the best mood to begin with when she made comment. But it did get me thinking.

I don’t think of what Spencer does as tricks so much as a reflection of him learning a pattern which is a form of connection – a physical manifestation of his learning. It is so hard with pre-verbal babies to know if they understand you. But when you can say, “Spencer, go get your bear” and he does, I feel like we are communicating. I also think he is a baby genius, but that is probably the case for most first time moms. Anyway, she pissed me off and I can’t really articulate it, but what do you think? Is peek-a-boo developmental progress or a stupid pet trick?

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